My Journey to Birth Coaching: Why I am studying with Yolande Norris-Clark and the Free Birth Society?

I was 28 years old, and thinking that I really should get my regular doctor checks done. There was something about turning 29 which made me want to think control of my health, so I booked a gynecology appointment. Leading up to the appointment, I was terrified; I knew the pain that came with Pap smears, but I just hoped that since this would be my second test, it wouldn’t be so bad. 

The day of the appointment, I showed up at the doctors, and waited in the doctor's office for ten minutes unclothed and cold. I was extremely worried of what was about to happen, but I kept trying to calm down my nervous system, to prevent a straight out panic attack. I texted my best friend, hoping that her kind words would make me feel better. Eventually, a woman doctor walked in and I tried to reassure myself that is everything was going to be okay.

I just need to keep calm.

We spoke briefly, and then she began her the examination. She clamped me, and inserted her fingers, not once asking for consent. The pain was excruciating, and I felt totally violated.  She told me that everything looked fine, and that I would get the results of the Pap smear in a few weeks. She walked out, and I got dressed so quickly, leaving so fast that I didn’t even stop at the check out counter.

As I walked back to my car, I was in shock; I could barely breathe. As I drove home, I began to cry, because I realized that there was no way I could go through that again. I cried because I kept thinking how can I have a baby if they can’t check my cervix? How will I be able to endure the pain of childbirth, if I can't endure the pain of a cervical checkup?

I felt disgusted. I made a promise to myself that I would never do that again, EVER! It didn't matter if I couldn’t have kids, a lifelong dream of mine, I would never allow a check like that again. 

As I walked into my house, I was already looking up alternatives to Pap smears, maybe there was a blood test, instead, I wondered. But then, I remembered an interview with Yolande Norris-Clark on a Luke Storey podcast. Perhaps she had an alternative? She didn't seem to have one, and as I did more research it was becoming clear that maybe it wasn’t even necessary.

I began to follow Yolande Norris-Clark, the Free Birth Society and Amanda from itjustbirth on Instagram, becuase it felt like they were speaking directly to me. I started to see that maybe there was another way for me to give birth without these checks. Perhaps, one day, I could just have a free birth? I mean, that seems easier than explaining to nurses and doctors that I refused a vaginal check.  Although, you have the “right” to refuse a vaginal check if a doctor or nurse deems it “necessary” then they can hold you down, and “perform the examination” anyway.

I became really interested in the Free Birth Society’s Radical Birth Keeping school. Initially, I told myself to wait for 2022; there was no rush. But then I thought, maybe there is a rush, maybe I do need to do it now. So I enrolled! Anyway, that is my journey to Birth Coaching. I will be offering Birth Trauma Debrief, and Birth Coaching, very soon! Please email me at hello@morgandoman.com if you are interested in either of these services or have a similar story.

P.S. My current coaching business is not changing, this is just an addition!