Holiday Series: Overeating, Over drinking and How to Say ‘no’

As the holiday season begins with thanksgiving on Thursday, I am reminded of how difficult this season can be for people-pleasers. It’s like all the demands of life magnify and it can be unbearable. Add in restrictions we are all facing, due to quarantine and the whole thing becomes extra overwhelming this year. 

You want to make everyone happy but that is impossible. 

So what happens? You need an escape. I get it. I have been there. The loneliness in a room full of people is truly the worst thing. You are lonely and detached from yourself because you are exhausted. You have given every part of you and you get nothing back. 

It’s really difficult. 

To quench the pain and suffering, you over drink and overeat and just keep going. It is a moment of relief. Followed by anger at yourself and feeling of being too full.  Is it time to change this year? I hope so! You certainly deserve to have it better off. So how can you start to STOP.  Many people think it's a willpower issue. The overconsumption in general during the holidays. But it's not. 

It is a dissatisfaction problem. Something isn’t quite right. Something isn't what you wanted it to be. And so you are overdoing it to numb the pain. It will work but only for a moment. 

So what's the answer? The answer is simple: Put yourself first. 

Simple? Pretty simple, right?

Unfortunately, after years of putting everyone else first this will seem totally foreign to you. It will seem evil and fill you with guilt because that is what you were programmed to believe. That when you put your needs first, you are sinful. We are all programmed to believe that the moment we get in trouble the first time for saying “no” at a young age.

So how can we start to resist this horrible cycle?

1. Make ONE promise to yourself every morning from Thanksgiving all the way to New Year’s Day. Don’t ever let anyone get in your way.

2. Before every large meal, make a game plan on how you are going to avoid consuming anything you don’t want too.

3. Avoid negative people in your life. 

4. Every time guilt begins to creep into your life, change the perception and ask “Why do I feel guilty?” and change the narrative in your head.

This is the first step to actually enjoying your holiday season. It saddens me to see so many of you breaking your own promises to yourself just to numb the pain.

You can do this! You are strength itself and I know that as you begin to choose YOU, you will fly!

Email me at hello@morgandoman.com if you have any particular issues you need to work through! Next in the holiday series, tips for saying ‘no’ during the holidays. Check it out here